Sunday, January 3, 2010

thought for my dear children

Parenting is not an easy task. Becoming a parent is the easiest part, whereas, being a conscious and positive parent is a momentous task. Parenting is the most important role one faces in a lifetime. Parents who provide an encouraging environment for their children are rewarded when, as adults, their children realize a successful fit into the culture and society.
Parenting concepts are deeply rooted in Indian families, because of a strong, sustained tradition of educating and training young parents to accept, perform and establish enduring relationships and responsibilities with their children. Generally, the young mother is introduced to the nuances of parenting by way of the 'hands on' method at her parental home, and under the guidance of her mother or an experienced family member. This practice could be the reason why the need for professional parent education usually is not expressed.
Effective parenting enables children to build and develop positive behaviors and good, solid self-concepts that are important to functioning fully as a healthy adult. However, parenting skills can be strengthened if parents learn about themselves as a 'parent' and about child development. Learning about the stages of human development helps parents understand about their ever, changing roles in the lives of their children and also what is expected of a parent at each stage. Finally, a father's love and influence is as important as a mother's in the life of a child. Fathers should overcome the internal and external barriers that exist to fulfill the duties of fathering.
The concept of parenting and parenthood varies according to region, and varies within the rural, urban and tribal areas. Even, the concept changes with time. Presently, it seems there is again a new change in the concept which is knocking the door, which can be seen through the advent of new school of thought visible in new movies, latest media programmes and books. The concept is based on the presumption that a person should do what he wants to do and a child should be brought up in an environment that values his inner capabilities, talent and most importantly his own interests. Parents expectations should not be loaded on children and presented as their dreams.
This new concept even creates a feeling of jealousy into my mind on its late arrival because it feels good to imagine a freedom where you are able to give flight to your imagination and inculcate a feeling of respect for your interest. But ignoring this feeling of jealousy, I feel that this new way of parenting is good as there is nothing which is absolutely right or wrong and hence its good that child follows what he thinks is right and feels like following. Parents become facilitators instead of trainers to their children and let them grow as free individuals.
I can also see one other aspect of this otherwise new and beautiful concept of parenting which will be a point of debate in future once this new concept becomes popular. The other aspect which I see is the very basis of this new concept. This concept is based on the fact that a person should do what he wants. But, my question is how would a child know what he wants when at this age I myself don’t know what I want and knowing it is a difficult task.